Why thank you annon!
I’ve never answered a question like this before and I’m sorry if my answer doesn’t step up to what your expecting but ill try. I don’t know if it is something you can ignore instead of fight. I think in order to fight the urge focus on something you love, something that has such a strong pull that you can get lost in and find a new reason to fight for your life. Like photograpy or music or writing. Poor the urge on to something that will create.
Friend, you are the light at the end of my tunnel :)